An Author Fighter's Christmas Carol
by TLSoulDude
Summary: Christmas Carol fanmake. X Prodigy says that Christmas is "crap". However, when he's visited by the Nostalgia Critic and three ghosts, everything changes...
1. X Prodigy

_An Author Fighter's Christmas Carol_

_Me: Uh…hi. It's Christmas season, the time of year when everyone feels close together and gets that warm feeling inside. Well, this is the second time I've made a parody for Christmas, but THIS year, I'm doing probably one of the most iconic. Hope you find it satisfactory! I've gotta go prepare for my part!_

TLSoulDude production brings you…

_**A parody of one of the most iconic Christmas stories of all time…**_

_**Starring X Prodigy, DarkMagicianmon, Lunatic121, Roscoso, The Nostalgia Critic, Hanabi Hyuga, TLSoulDude, and Sylar…**_

_**An Author Fighter's Christmas Carol**_

Chapter 1: X Prodigy

A dragon-like raptor thing was standing next to someone who looked like an angel. Both of them were tending a stand, offering apples.

"Granny Smith, Mackintosh, and Golden Delicious." The dragon, Dimensiondude, called.

"Get 'em while they're here!" the angel said, chomping on an apple.

"I doubt we can sell any if you keep eating them, Soldier." D-Dude stated.

"Scarcity, D-Dude. Think outside the box." The angel shrugged before taking another bite.

Dimensiondude sighed before noticing that the fic is being read by you, the reader.

"Ah, greetings! I am here to tell the story." Dimensiondude stated.

"And I am here for kicks." The angel added.

"My name is Charles Dickens." D-Dude introduced.

"And my name is Angelic Soldier." Soldier finished before noticing something about Dimensiondude's introduction, "Hey! You're not Charles Dickens!"

"Yes, I am." D-Dude retorted.

"Charles Dickens was a nineteenth century novelist." Soldier explained, "A friggin' genius!"

"Look, this is a story. Just go with it," D-Dude stated, "Or do I have to unleash the rabid crotch-biting wildebeest again?"

"That…won't be necessary, Chuck." Angelic Soldier said, apologetically.

"Alright, time to get to the story." Dimensiondude said before beginning, in an eerie voice, "The Nostalgia Critic was dead to begin with…"

"WHAT?!" Angelic Soldier asked, dumbfounded.

"Don't worry, he's not REALLY dead. It's just the story." Dimensiondude explained, "As dead as a doornail. In life, Nostalgia Critic was the partner of a shrewd money-lender named X Prodigy."

"And here's where we let the story take its course for now…" Soldier said.

A man with red hair and clothing walked out, a Sparda sword was strapped to his back, and he was wearing a Hollow Mask. THIS was X Prodigy. He noticed three people playing instruments—a white hedgehog, a girl with pale eyes, and a man with dark hair.

"Could ya give us some dough?" the hedgehog asked, "We're barely able to make end's meet."

X put a coin in there, but, as he was walking away, pulled a string, causing the coin to jump out and back into his hands.

"DUDE!" the hedgehog shouted.

"That's just twisted." The girl growled.

"Say he'll live to regret this." The man advised.

"YOU'LL LIVE TO REGRET THIS!" the hedgehog shouted before realizing what he said and wheeled over to the man, "Thanks a lot, now I look crazy!"

X grinned under his Hollow Mask. For some reason, seeing the trio's suffering gave him immense pleasure. He walked over to his place of business—a money-lending store. D-Dude and Soldier followed him to the store.

"Jeez, can't see anything through these windows…" the dragonsaur growled before cleaning it with one of Soldier's wings.

"Oh thank you." Angelic Soldier said, sarcastically, "You're so kind…"

Inside the store, X Prodigy noticed his employee—a man in purple armor and had a head full of blue hair and matching eyes—he was standing in front of a fire.

"DarkMagicianmon!" X shouted, the man immediately, "What the heck are you doing?"

"Trying to warm up a bit." The man, DarkMagicianmon, said, apologetically.

X Prodigy sighed in exasperation as he walked in front of DM. The Hollow Devil pointed to his jacket and asked, "What is this?"

"A jacket." DM replied.

"And this?" X asked, gesturing to his shirt.

"A shirt." DM answered.

"These are called clothes, DM. They were invented to protect humanity from the harsh elements of nature…and to hide our more personal features." X stated.

"The less we think about your personal features, the happier we'll all be." Stated a man at about twenty with dark hair and glasses. He was Glyre Shygym.

"Another thing." DM said, "The Shygym Brothers have asked for some spare coal for the fires."

"It's freakin' SUBARCTIC in here!" shouted the second eldest Shygym brother, Ken, who was rubbing his arms.

"ALL MY QUILLS ARE FROZEN!" the youngest Shygym brother, Ryan, said through chattering teeth.

"How would the Shygym brothers like to be suddenly…" X Prodigy then shouted, at the top of his lungs, "UNEMPLOYED?!"

"HEAT WAVE!" the three brothers shouted, dressed like Jamaicans, "This is my island in the sun!"

The three then dispersed to do their various jobs.

"I…think you convinced them again…" DM stated.

Outside, Soldier whistled, "This guy's got 'em well-trained."

"Well, if you rule them with an iron fist, what else would you expect?" D-Dude asked.

Back inside, X Prodigy sat down and began taking in the day's income.

"X Prodigy lived his life alone, with no children and no relatives except for his nephew, Ross." D-Dude narrated.

A man with purple hair and a red shirt rapped on the door. DM walked over and opened it.

"Oh, hey, Roscoso." DM greeted.

"Hi, DM." Ross said, "How's Hikari?"

"She's doin' good." DM replied.

"_THIS leech again?"_ X sighed, mentally.

"Merry Christmas, Uncle X Prodigy." Ross said, walking over to X.

"Crap." X Prodigy said, "Why'd you come here?"

"Do I need a reason to swing by my uncle's place on Christmas Eve?" Ross asked.

"Yes." X Prodigy deadpanned.

"How would you like to come over to my place for Christmas dinner?" Ross asked.

"Crap." X Prodigy simply said.

"What was that?" Ross asked.

"You heard me…" X Prodigy said, venomously, "If I had MY way, any moron who went around with 'Merry Christmas' would be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stake of holly through his heart."

"Ouch." Ken simply said.

"Well, even if Christmas never made me a dollar richer or a point smarter, I WILL treasure it, no matter what." Ross said, proudly, "Even outside of Christmas' origins, which is sacred, it is still a time of love. So, I say, Merry Christmas."

DM began clapping his hands while the Shygym brothers began whooping.

"Give it to 'im!" Glyre shouted.

"That's the ticket!" Ken whooped.

"Show him a hard time!" Ryan exclaimed.

"He's got nothin'…" Soldier said from outside.

"I wonder how people spend Christmas ON THE UNEMPLOYMENT LINE?!" X Prodigy shouted. The Halfa and Urban Warriors stopped and returned to their business.

"I stand corrected." Soldier sighed. He then looked to the door, which was still open, "Let's get in! It'll be warmer in there!" The angel and Dragonsaur bolted in as the door got closed. Soldier began to shiver, "Actually, I think it's COLDER in here…"

"I know how you feel." D-Dude replied. He HATED the cold. The Dragonsaur then shot some fire at the coal to try and improve the temperature before continuing, "Now, at this time of year, it was traditional for charity workers to collect money for the needy and homeless."

Three people then walked in. One was a big, red, muscular man with sawed-down horns, a right hand made of red stone, a trench coat, black pants, and a large gun strapped to his side. The second one was short, had a red coat, blonde hair, yellow eyes, and gloves. And the last one was dressed in a red and blue suit with several guns and swords on him. They were the Men in Red: Hellboy (Hellboy), Ed Elric (Full Metal Alchemist), and Deadpool (Cable & Deadpool).

"Who're you?" DM simply asked.

"We're from the government." Hellboy replied, "Collecting charity."

"Yeah, because the rich bankers can't afford to buy the good cars they want." Deadpool explained, "So, we're supposed to get it for other people by makin' 'em feel sorry!"

"Ignore the nutjob." Ed stated.

"Do ya know where we can find X Prodigy or the Nostalgia Critic?" Hellboy asked.

"You're a bit late for Nostalgia Critic, but X Prodigy's over there." DM replied.

The three walked over to the Hollow Devil and Pokemorph.

"Hey, we're from the Men in Red Secret Service." Hellboy said, "And, as such, we're forced to walk out of our homes and collect charity to those…LESS fortunate."

"Well, you've come to the right place." Ross grinned, "X is VERY generous to donations."

X Prodigy gave Ross a 'leave-me-out-of-this' look before asking, "Ross, aren't you late for something?"

"Unfortunately, yes." Replied Ross, "So, I shall make MY donation…" Ross handed some coins to Ed, "And I'll be going now."

"Thanks." Ed said.

"Oh, Uncle." Ross said, turning around to X, "Come have Christmas dinner with Marissa and me."

"Why'd you even marry her?" X asked, "She didn't make ya any richer."

"Why?" Ross asked, as if this was the silliest question imaginable, "Because I fell in love."

X snorted, "Only thing that makes less sense than 'Merry Christmas'."

Ross walked out as the Men in Red returned their gaze to the Hollow Devil.

"So, what should we put ya down for?" Ed asked.

"Nothing." X deadpanned.

"What, you wanna be anonymous?" Hellboy asked.

"NO, I wanna be LEFT A-FRIGGIN' LONE." X shot back.

During the following conversation, Deadpool was thinking…

_'Will Bella go for Edward, which is now pretty much decided? Or will she go with Jacob, the guy with an ACTUAL personality? Either way, I can still kill the guy and take her. Man, these Dickensian suits SUCK. Would it kill these guys to stylize their clothes? Which one is better, Diet Coca Cola or original Coca Cola Classic? I mean, Diet's healthy and all, but original's got the flavor…'_

"Aren't there any poorhouses or prisons?" X asked.

"Unfortunately, yes." Ed replied.

"Good. I thought something stopped them in full-force." X said.

"Deadpool tried it, though." Hellboy stated, "It didn't work."

"My money goes to the poorhouses and prisons. Send the poor THERE." X Prodigy stated.

"But…many would rather DIE!" Ed said, dumbfounded.

"If they'd rather die, then they'd better DO IT and decrease the surplus population." X replied, coldly.

"I think I prefer Coca Cola Classic." Deadpool said.

"Alright, I've had it." Hellboy said, "Let's get outta here."

"What?" Deadpool asked as he was dragged out by Hellboy and Ed Elric.

"Wow…that guy IS cold." Soldier simply said, shivering, "Not NEARLY as cold as this weather, though."

X pulled the wreath down and heard something outside. He opened the door to see a bipedal, Siberian tiger wearing Hawaiian clothes (despite the weather). The tiger, Xemnas1992, was singing.

Xemnas1992: _**Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way! Oh, what fun it is to ride a…one horse…open…sleigh?**_

Xem looked up at X Prodigy, who was glaring at him.

"WHAT?" X asked, irritated.

"Uh…spare change?" Xem asked, nervously.

"Oh, I'll spare you SOMETHING…" X stated.

Xem immediately found himself sailing through the air.

"WHAT DID I DO?!" the Roswellian asked as he landed in a snow-bank.

Back with X Prodigy, the Hollow growled as he returned to his seat.


	2. One More Sleep 'Til Christmas

Chapter 2: One More Sleep

That night, DM walked up, looking hesitant.

"Uh…X?" DM asked, "It's closing time."

"Fine." X said, "I'll see you tomorrow morning at eight."

"Go on, DM." Glyre said.

"Ask him." Ken said.

"What harm could it do?" Ryan asked.

"Tomorrow's Christmas, X." DM said, shakily.

"Eight THIRTY, then." X stated.

"Half an hour isn't really what people get when it's Christmas." DM replied.

"What DO they usually get?" X asked, irritably.

"Uh…" DM looked pretty hesitant as he replied, "The whole day."

"The WHOLE day?" X Prodigy asked.

"I wasn't in this." Glyre said.

"It was DM's idea." Ken said.

"I told him NOT to." Ryan said.

"Guys, knock it off." DM hissed before saying, "X, all other businesses will be closed. You won't have anyone to do business WITH." X Prodigy just glared at DM, who said, "Just a thought."

"I don't really see the point in it." The Hollow Devil said, "But, since I'm the only one who can't, take the day-off." The Shygym Brothers started whooping at this, "SHUT UP! Make it HALF A DAY!"

"Crap." Glyre swore.

"Ah, it's still half a day." Ken shrugged.

"Ken, you're an optimist." Ryan stated before asking, "Why do we work for this guy?"

"It was the only job available and, with OUR economy, we snapped at the first job." Replied Glyre.

X walked out of his building of business and to another part of town…just leaving Xem to shudder and shake in the cold.

Back in the building, D-Dude and Soldier were continuing to observe the happenings.

"Now that their employer was gone," D-Dude narrated, "DarkMagicianmon and the Shygym Brothers could close up for the night, even though it would only be for about half a day. But, even so, the counting house could be filled with the joy of Christmas."

DM closed a book with a content look as he said to the Shygym Brothers, "Guys, looks like it's time to close shop."

DM then smiled as he broke into song.

DarkMagicianmon: _**There's magic in the air this evening  
Magic in the air  
The world is at her best, you know  
When people love and care**_

The Shygym Brothers picked up a stack of papers and began putting them away. Ryan accidentally ran into Ken and the two younger brothers fell to the ground in heaps.

DarkMagicianmon: _**The promise of excitement is one the night will keep  
After all, there's only one more sleep til Christmas**_

"Guys, stop lying on the job." Glyre said.

"Out of ALL the corny puns…" Ken muttered as he picked himself up.

DarkMagicianmon: _**The world has got a smile today  
The world has got a glow  
There's no such thing as strangers when  
A stranger says "hello"**_

Glyre pulled the window shutter down and flipped a sign around as his brothers put the papers away.

DarkMagicianmon: _**And everyone is family, we're having so much fun  
After all, there's only one more sleep til Christmas**_

The four were outside as DM locked the door. Glyre was wearing a black leather jacket, Ken was wearing a gray hoodie with Homer Simpson on the front, and Ryan was wearing a green jacket with white stripes down the arms.

DarkMagicianmon: _**Tis the season to be jolly and joyous  
With a burst of pleasure, we feel it arrive  
Tis the season when the saints can employ us  
To spread the news about peace and to keep love alive **_

Something skidded past the group. DM smirked as he saw Ratchet (Ratchet & Clank), Clank (Ratchet & Clank), Skid (Ratchet & Clank), and Sasha (Ratchet & Clank UYA). All of them were sliding across the ice.

"Hey, it's the Q-Force's Christmas ice-skating party." DM smirked as he began sliding on the ice.

D-Dude grinned as he grabbed Soldier.

"HEY!" Angelic Soldier shouted as he found himself skating across the ice with D-Dude. The two came to a halt, but the angel fell into a trashcan.

"That was pretty fun." D-Dude grinned.

Soldier looked out, showing that he was covered in the contents of said garbage carrier.

"NOT for me…" he muttered.

DarkMagicianmon: _**There's something in the wind today  
That's good for everyone**_

"See ya later, DM." The brothers said as they walked away.

"Merry Christmas." DM called.

"Merry Christmas." Ken replied.

DarkMagicianmon: _**Yes, faith is in our hearts today  
We're shining like the sun  
And everyone can feel it, the feeling's running deep  
After all, there's only one more sleep til Christmas**_

After all, there's only one more sleep til Christmas day

DM sighed as he looked at the sky. A shooting star streaked past. DM smiled as he continued on his way.


	3. Nostalgia Critic

Chapter 3: Nostalgia Critic

(A/N: No, Nostalgia Critic WON'T be swearing like he does in the videos. This fic IS rated K+, after all.)

X Prodigy walked through an alleyway. The alleyway was dark, dank, and, possibly, filled with unpleasant characters.

D-Dude and Soldier were following the Hollow Devil while riding inside a horse and buggy.

"X Prodigy didn't spend any more than he needed, even on personal comforts." D-Dude narrated, "He lived in the darkest part of the town."

"I think the readers already saw that part." Soldier stated.

"Oh, right, sorry." D-Dude apologized before continuing, in a low voice, "Once again, the Nostalgia Critic was dead to begin with…"

"Why're we whispering?" Soldier asked, also whispering.

"It's for dramatic emphasis."

"Oh."

"Just keep in mind that the Nostalgia Critic was dead." D-Dude continued, whispering, "Otherwise, none of the happenings will seem wondrous…you probably will, anyway."

"Popcorn?" Soldier asked, holding the bag of movie treats out to D-Dude.

"No thanks." Replied the Dragonsaur.

X Prodigy walked over to the knocker of his door and put the lock in. He unlocked the door, but noticed something about the knocker. It was, steadily shifting into another shape.

"Did I get high again?" X asked. But then he realized something…he WASN'T drugged!

The knocker then took on a new shape. It was of a somewhat round-faced man with a beard, black hat, and a pair of glasses.

"Nostalgia Critic?" X Prodigy asked.

"Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to…" the knocker said before screaming, at the top of its lungs, "X PRODIGY!"

The Hollow Devil jumped as the horse reared up, knocking D-Dude and Soldier off and into the snow. The head looked at the chaos.

"Okay, maybe I over-did that…" the head stated before shifting back into the knocker.

"Dimensiondude! You okay?!" Soldier asked the apparently unconscious D-Dude, "I mean, Mr. Dickens! Charlie?! Ya in there?!"

Dimensiondude sat up and continued, as if nothing happened, "To say that the sudden appearance of Nostalgia Critic's head on X Prodigy's door knocker didn't disturb X would be untrue. But he dismissed it as he noticed that nothing was different as it was a few moments ago."

"He's okay." Soldier stated, "Didn't even break his concentration."

"What?" D-Dude asked.

"Nothin'." Replied TAS.

X Prodigy opened the door as the angel and dragonsaur bolted for it. However, it closed in D-Dude's face. The dragonsaur turned around and continued his narration.

"X Prodigy stepped into his house, caring not for the darkness." The dragonsaur narrated, "Dark was cheap and X LIKED it."

"HOW do you keep narrating, even under physical pain?" Soldier asked.

Meanwhile, X Prodigy was walking through his house with a candle.

"However, the incident at the door had made X wary. So, guided only by a candle, he searched his rooms." D-Dude continued.

"Okay, we're down HERE and he's up THERE." Soldier said, "HOW the heck do you know what he's doing?!"

"Because writers are omniscient. I know EVERYTHING." D-Dude said, grinning.

"Heh. THAT'S a lie." Soldier muttered.

"In order to continue his search, thoroughly, X was forced to light the lamps." D-Dude said as the windows suddenly burst into light.

"Lucky." Soldier said.

X Prodigy locked the doors and looked around his room. He saw something move. With a savage war-cry, he jumped at the thing and sliced it to ribbons before realizing…

"CRAP! I destroyed my best robe!" X snarled.

Outside, D-Dude was on the other side of the gate, waiting for Soldier to jump down.

"Come on, Soldier, you won't die. It's UNDER fifty feet." D-Dude stated,

"I'm NOT jumping!" Soldier said, stubbornly.

"I'll catch you." D-Dude said.

"Fine." Soldier murmured before praying, "Lord, save my poor, broken body…"

Soldier jumped and D-Dude was ready to catch him…about three feet away.

"Missed." D-Dude said.

"Thanks for the help, Mr. Dick-ens." TAS growled.

"Watch the language, Soldier. This fic IS rated K+." D-Dude explained.

Back in X's room, the Hollow Devil was wearing his SECOND best robe and began to sit down to a nice meal consisting of a potato and some gruel.

Suddenly, the bell began to ring. He looked up to see that it was ringing by itself. It was ringing for about five minutes before the fire died out. He looked over at it and saw the face of the person that appeared on the doorknocker appear three times on the mantle. He suddenly heard the sound of clanks and footsteps. The door suddenly unlocked and snapped open. Standing there was a portly man with a black jacket, white shirt, glasses, a beard, and a hat. He untied a handkerchief around his head as his jaw fell open. A single crack later, he sighed in content.

"Man, I've had a crick in my jaw for God-knows how long…" he said.

"Who are you?" X Prodigy asked, more disturbed for the stranger's sake than scared for his own.

"What? You never saw my Youtube videos? SHAME ON YOU…" he said before sighing and asking, "Try asking who I WAS."

"O-kay…" X said. He was now all but convinced that this guy was high, "Who WERE you."

"In life, I was your partner, the Nostalgia Critic." Replied the man.

"Well, it DOES look like ya, NC." X said, "Can ya sit down?"

"No, I must forever stand because that's what TL wrote into my script." Nostalgia Critic replied.

"O-kay." X said before saying to himself, "This CAN'T be happening…"

"Why do you doubt your own eyes?" NC asked, "Or do you need glasses? They'll make ya look smarter!"

"NO." X deadpanned, "It's just…a slight bit of indigestion can cause them to go nuts. You could be a bit of undigested beef, a blob of mustard, crumb of cheese, an underdone potato, or even this gruel! It's more of gravy than a grave of you. Crap, I say. CRAP."

Nostalgia Critic roared at the top of his lungs, causing X to jump and hide behind his chair.

"Alright, let's face fact: I AM here and have to stay here." Replied NC.

"Incidentally, what's with the chain?" X asked, pointing to Critic's chain, which had several steel boxes and cinderblocks tied to it.

"THIS is the chain I forged in life by my deeds. Link by link and yard by yard." Replied Nostalgia Critic, "For eternity…yeah, it's gonna be Hell…"

"But…you were a good guy, Critic." X said, "You had a love for business."

"BUSINESS?! MANKIND was my business!" NC shouted before adding, calmly, "Along with mocking half-butt movies from the 80's and 90's. And I did a pretty good job of it…"

"Why the heck are you here in the first place?" X asked.

"Why am I here?! HAVEN'T YOU READ THE CHRISTMAS FRIGGIN' CAROL?!" NC shouted before inhaling deeply and exhaling and saying, calmly, "I came to warn you of the fate that befell me. Tonight, you will be haunted by three spirits…"

"Haven't I been haunted ENOUGH as it is?" X asked.

"Sorry. NO FRIGGIN' JUNK!" NC shouted before saying, "Expect the first ghost when the bell rings at one o'clock…"

"Can't I deal with them all at once and get it over with?" X asked.

"Nope. That'd ruin the drama." Replied Nostalgia Critic before continuing, "Expect the second one when the bell tolls two and the third when…never mind. You get the drift. Listen to 'em or else you'll be in for a bigger Hell than me. Bye-bye!"

Nostalgia Critic then jumped out the window. There was the sound of something hitting the pavement below. A woman screamed, tires screeched, and there was the sound of two things colliding.

"Always my pleasure to introduce a little anarchy." Critic's voice said from below.


	4. Christmas Past

(A/N: This chapter's based off the George C. Scott Christmas Carol.)

Chapter 4: Christmas Past

The fire burst back into life, showing X Prodigy was shaking slightly, but all alone.

"Calm, slowly, returned to the room as Nostalgia Critic vanished." D-Dude narrated, "And X Prodigy was convinced that he was either drunk or high."

"The funny thing was he wasn't either." Soldier added.

"Can it, Soldier." D-Dude said as he hurled a grappling hook up and the two began to climb up it.

"Wouldn't it make more sense if we FLEW up?" Soldier asked.

"Yes, but it's a little late now…" grunted D-Dude.

X Prodigy laid down, ready for a nice, long sleep. Before long, snores were flowing through the house.

A few hours passed and X Prodigy did not so much as stir…until a clock chimed one o'clock.

"EXPECT THE FIRST GHOST WHEN THE BELL TOLLS ONE!" D-Dude shouted.

"Why're you shouting?" Soldier asked.

"I don't know…" D-Dude replied. Suddenly, a burst of light came from the room, sending the Dragonsaur and Angel down to the ground in heaps.

Inside, X Prodigy sprung awake at the sight of the radiant light. He tore apart his curtains.

"X Prodigy…" said the voice of a girl.

Outside the curtains was a girl with pale skin, white eyes, a tan robe, dark hair, and a large candle-cap.

"Are you, by chance, the spirit whose coming was told to me by the Nostalgia Critic?" X asked.

"I think you're confused, because I'm actually Winston Churchill." Replied the girl with a small giggle, "Yes, I am. I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past, but I also go by Hanabi."

"But…you're just a girl." X said, taking in Hanabi (Naruto) and her size.

"Size is NO measure of power." Hanabi stated, "Now, we shall go see your past…"

"Uh…what's with that cap in your hand?" X asked.

"I carry the light of truth." Replied Hanabi, "You can use this to put it out, if you wish…"

"Alright, let's do it…" D-Dude said as he flew up with Soldier.

"What're we doing again?" Soldier asked.

"Getting inside there…" D-Dude replied, opening the window and jumping in just as light consumed the room.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

"What the heck?!" X Prodigy shouted as the four appeared in the middle of a snowy area that looked like a school.

"Where are we?" Soldier asked.

"We are in the past." Replied Hanabi, "And don't worry about a rift in the space/time continuum. We'll be invisible and silent as a grave."

"Makes about as much sense as any other time-travel fic TL's written." Soldier stated.

"No fourth-wall breaking, Soldier." D-Dude reprimanded before continuing his narration, "X Prodigy was overcome with the appearance of the place and over a thousand smells."

"Hey, I know this place!" X Prodigy said, sounding excited, "This was my old school!" A group of boys ran past, "Hey! Those were my friends! Hey, it's me! X Prodigy!"

"They can't hear you, X." Hanabi stated.

"Well, at least THIS place is safe…" Soldier said.

"Angelic Soldier!" snarled a man with bat-wings and a halberd (A/N: Angelic Soldier's enemy, Demonic Soldier.).

"I figured as much." TAS sighed before blocking the halberd with his axe.

"Soldier, stop messing around with Demonic Soldier and let's get going." D-Dude stated. Soldier sighed before deflecting the blow from the halberd and punching TDS in the face and bolting off.

"Can you find your way?" Hanabi asked X Prodigy.

"I could do it, blindfolded." Replied X, smugly.

The four then entered the schoolhouse to see a boy, far younger than X Prodigy himself.

"A young boy, neglected by his own father and without a friend on Christmas Day." Hanabi said before asking, "Does he look familiar?"

"He does." Replied X, "He's me. And, actually, I DID have friends on Christmas." X walked over and looked at his younger form, who was reading a book, "The guys in the graphic novel. Rorschach, Comedian, Silk Spectre, and Nite Owl…Dr. Manhattan not so much."

"WHAT KID READS THAT?!" Soldier shouted.

"A disturbed one. That's what." D-Dude replied.

"But no REAL friends." Hanabi corrected X.

"The Watchmen? NOT real? Surely, you jest." X replied with a tone of sarcasm, "But they were real to me."

"If I remember correctly, your father carried a grudge." Hanabi said, "Why?"

"His wife died in childbirth. HIS birth." X replied, sadly.

"X Prodigy then saw himself steadily aging…" D-Dude continued.

The younger X Prodigy then began to change a little bit at a time until he seemed in his mid-teens.

"Wow. Does bein' a ghost mean ya get a fast-forward button?" X asked.

"Yeah, pretty much." Replied Hanabi.

"X Prodigy!" called a slightly older girl as she walked in.

"Does SHE look familiar?" Hanabi asked.

"Yeah, that's my sister…MistressofDawn." X replied.

"She died a young woman." Hanabi said, "But it wasn't in vein. She gave birth to your nephew—Ross. He looks like her…"

"Vaguely." X replied.

"No argument here." D-Dude said.

X Prodigy stood up and hugged Dawn and said, excitedly, "Dawn! What're you doing here?"

"I came to take you home!" replied Dawn. X looked a bit wary at this before Dawn explained, "Dad's not the person he used to be. He's much nicer now. When I asked him if you could come home he said 'Yes'!"

"Wow…I thought he'd charge me a couple of bucks first." Younger X stated.

"Usually, he WOULD have…" X Prodigy muttered.

"Did you say something?" Hanabi asked.

"No, not really." Replied X.

The two walked out of the house to see Kisuke Urahara (Bleach) waiting for them.

"X Prodigy." He said.

"Dad." X replied.

Obviously, the two were still relatively cold to each other…

"Can't really see the family resemblance…" Soldier said.

"Neither can I." Replied D-Dude.

"Dawn said I could come home." X said.

"Yeah, you can." Replied Urahara, "For three days."

"I thought you meant for a while LONGER." Dawn said, looking a bit betrayed.

"Three days is long enough." Urahara replied, "I've gotten him an apprenticeship with some assassin guy. You'll work for him as soon as the three days are up." Urahara jerked his head to a coach, "Come on."

"Wow…that guy's mean." Soldier said.

"Yeah, Kisuke studied REAL hard to get this downpat." D-Dude replied, "Never knew that guy was a good actor…"

"Now, we'll visit another Christmas…about three years later." Hanabi said, holding up her cap.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The group was suddenly in the middle of a street at night.

"Now, they were in another part of the country at another time." D-Dude explained, "It was Christmas Eve and the lamps were being lit." D-Dude blew fire at a candle, accidentally causing one of Soldier's wings to catch fire.

"YOU JERK! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!" Soldier shouted.

"Soldier, can you swim?" D-Dude asked as he saw a large barrel of water. Without waiting for a response, D-Dude shoved the angel into the barrel. He didn't come back up, "Uh…Soldier? You're not resurfacing. I'm fairly concerned…"

"Do you know this place?" Hanabi asked.

"Know this place? Of course I do!" X replied, "This is Nukid's One Piece Action Figure Factory!"

"A One Piece obsessor, through and through." D-Dude said, pulling out Angelic Soldier, who was frozen solid.

The group walked in to see a teen with blonde hair and a black hoodie jacket.

"Okay, guys. Move the desks back! It's party time!" Nukid shouted, "Nostalgia Critic, X, put away your work and relax!"

"Holy crap, it's Nukid himself!" X said as a woman, three girls, and three boys walked in, "There's Sofia Scotts! Their three daughters and their suitors!"

D-Dude then slammed Soldier's frozen form on the ground. The ice shattered as Soldier sat up, shuddering.

"Thanks for the heads-up, Chuck." Soldier growled.

"Alright, guys, find a partner!" Nukid called, "Time to dance!"

Boys found girls, bowed to each other, and began dancing. X Prodigy remained in the back, looking uneasy. A Pokemorph then walked over.

"I'm Katie." She introduced.

"X Prodigy." X replied.

"Wanna dance?" she asked.

"Got nothin' better to do." Replied X Prodigy.

"Hey, you two are looking chummy." Nukid said, "But hey. Gotta get to Sofia before anyone else can. I've noticed some pervs eyeing her."

Nukid then took off as X and Katie began to dance. The dancing continued for a short while. Suddenly, everything faded away.

"Nukid, a silly person." Hanabi said.

"Silly? He was alright." X Prodigy stated.

"Spent a few dollars on Christmas Eve, danced like a monkey, always tried to make people feel good." Hanabi explained before asking, "Sound like the opposite of someone?"

"Oh, REAL mature." X Prodigy said, sarcastically.

They appeared a few hours after the dance. X Prodigy was sitting next to Ranger.

"Saw you and Katie dancing together." Ranger said.

"Yeah, she was pretty good." X replied.

"Night to remember?" Ranger asked.

"Yeah…a night to remember. I won't forget it." X said.

"But you DID forget." Hanabi said, "Now, we fast forward to just a year later…"

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The four was overlooking a small park, where Katie was sitting, looking cold as X sat down next to her. X was in rather good-looking clothes.

"I was wondering if you'd COME at all." Katie stated.

"Sorry. A few people couldn't pay their rent. I had to slap them around a bit." X replied before asking, "Incidentally, why'd you ask that I met you here?"

"I've been replaced in your eyes." Katie said, "A new idol has taken my place. A GOLDEN one."

"TOO SUBTLE." Soldier shouted. D-Dude whipped the Angel on the butt, "OW! WHAT?!"

"Mosquito." Replied D-Dude.

"What're you saying?" X asked.

"What do you THINK I'm saying?" Katie asked, patience obviously growing thin, "I've been waiting for us to get married for over a year now and you still haven't said a precise date."

"I've…been busy." Replied X.

"That you have, X Prodigy." Katie replied, "If you were given a choice between me and your money, which would you pick?"

X looked taken aback by this before asking, "What do YOU think?"

"What a safe answer." Katie snapped before throwing a ring into the snow, "X Prodigy, I set you free. May you be happy in the life you've chosen!"

She then stormed off, looking angry. X Prodigy…just sat there.

"I almost went after her." X Prodigy said.

"ALMOST? Why didn't you go after her in the first place?" Hanabi asked, "What caused this in the first place?"

"My dad died and left me a small fortune. Best decision he ever made in his life." X Prodigy said, "I had to make it a bit bigger to be better for Katie and me. Soon after, it was just me."

"You've told me what you gained, but NOW, you shall see what you missed." Hanabi said as the scene changed again.

"I shall be needing therapy after this…" Soldier mumbled.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The scene changed to Katie, who looked a bit older. She was surrounded by a bunch of children who were obviously her own.

"Katie had KIDS?!" X shouted, dumbfounded, "They could've been MINE!"

"I was thinking the same thing." Hanabi replied.

Another Pokemorph then arrived.

"I know that guy! He was the one she married! Michael!" X said.

"Guess who I saw in town today." Michael said to Katie.

"Um…X Prodigy?" she asked.

"Correct." Replied Michael, "I heard his friend, Nostalgia Critic, is about to kick the bucket. I saw him in his counting house, all alone with only a single candle."

"Poor X Prodigy." Katie said, coldly, "Poor, skinflint X Prodigy."

"SAVE YOUR PITY! I DON'T NEED IT!" X shouted.

"She can't hear you. I think I've explained that." Hanabi said, a smirk growing on her face.

"She's getting creepier by the moment…" Soldier said.

"I heartily agree." D-Dude replied.

"Well, I WANT OUT!" X shouted, grabbing the cap in Hanabi's hand.

"Truth LIVES!" she shouted as X Prodigy shoved the cap on her head, "Truth LIVES! Truth lives…"

He completely covered her.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

He woke up, finding that he was wrestling with the carpet in his room.

"TWO things I've ruined…" he muttered as D-Dude and Soldier appeared outside the window.

"Glad THAT fiasco's over…" Soldier said.

"Don't get comfy, there's two more." D-Dude corrected.

"Oh, cra…"


	5. Christmas Present

(A/N: I've always wanted to play the Ghost of Christmas Present and this parody gave me the chance to do so. This chapter is based off the Muppet's special.)

Chapter 5: Ghost of Christmas Present

X Prodigy growled as he crawled back into his bed and pulled the curtains shut. He sighed as he tried, once again, to sleep. He got it…for only a few minutes before the clock struck two.

"Expect the second ghost on night's second toll." D-Dude said.

"At least you're keeping it quiet." Soldier said.

Nothing was happening.

"You said the second spirit would arrive on the second stroke of midnight." X said, grinning under his mask, "But there isn't anything! Take THAT, Nostalgia Critic!"

"X PRODIGY!" shouted a voice from another room.

"Yeah, I've gotta learn to keep my mouth shut." X stated.

"Come in and know me better, man!" the voice called again.

X Prodigy pulled the curtains open and walked over to the next room. He flung the doors open to show that it was filled with food! In the midst of it was a white hedgehog, about four feet tall, with white fur, a golden mane, blue eyes, mismatched gloves, black and turquoise cowboy boots with matching hat and poncho, and a large grin on his face.

"Uh…who the heck are you?" X asked.

"I am the Ghost of Christmas Present, but I also go by TLSoulDude!" the Ghost of Christmas Present, or TL, said, "Come in and know me better, man!"

"You already said that." X stated.

"I did?" TL asked, "Did I also tell ya that I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present, but I also go by TLSoulDude?"

"You're…a little absent-minded, aren't ya?" X asked.

"Is that a crack about my height?" TL asked, playfully, "I'm so short that I've gotta step on a bathroom scale TWICE to measure myself! Did I already say 'Come in and know me better, man'?"

"Uh…yes, you did." X said. This hedgehog was either stupid or…just plain weird.

"Oh yeah, I live in the here and now." TL explained, "As do all my family."

"You've got brothers?" X asked.

"Yeah, two hundred and fifty-seven at last count." TL replied.

"257?" X asked before adding, as a joke, "Imagine the grocery bills!"

"HA!" TL laughed out loud, "And they said you had NO sense of humor!"

"SOMETHIN'S gonna happen, I just know it." Soldier muttered.

"Come on." D-Dude said, "We're all the way up here."

TL then flung the windows wide-open, sending the Dragonsaur and Angel, screaming, to the snowy ground.

"THAT FOR EXAMPLE!" Soldier shouted.

"We're going out INTO THE WORLD!" TL said, taking in the brisk winter air.

"Will…this be like Christmas Past?" X asked.

"Nah. It's actually pretty fast." TL replied. He gestured to his poncho, "Touch my poncho. It's pure cotton!"

X touched it, "Yeah. It does feel pretty good…"

They suddenly faded away.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The two reappeared in the streets, now hustling and bustling in daylight.

"What is this?" X asked.

"Don't ya know?" TL asked with a laugh, "It's Christmas Morning!"

TL then burst into song.

TLSoulDude: _**It's the singing in a street corner choir! It's going home and getting warm by the fire! It's true, wherever you find love, it feels like Christmas!**_

Other characters started to sing along.

April Goodeve (OC): _**A cup of kindness that we share with another…**_

Scott Highflier (OC): _**A sweet reunion with a friend or a brother…**_

Ryan Syrus (OC): _**In all the places you find love…**_

All three: _**It feels like Christmas!**_

TLSoulDude: _**It is the season of the heart! A special time of caring! The ways of love made clear! It is the season of the spirit! The message if we hear it is make it last all year!**_

Ginny Weasley (Harry Potter): _**It's in the giving of a gift to another. A pair of mittens that were made by your mother.**_

Harry Potter (Harry Potter): _**It's all the ways that we show love that feel like Christmas!**_

Apu Nahasapeemapetillum (The Simpsons): _**A part of childhood we'll always remember…**_

Snake Jailbird (The Simpsons): _**It is the summer of the soul in December…**_

Apu and Snake: _**Yes, when you do your best for love, it feels like Christmas!**_

TLSoulDude: _**It is the season of the heart! A special time of caring! The ways of love made clear! It is the season of the spirit! The message if we hear it is make it last all year!  
**__**It's the singing in a street corner choir! It's going home and getting warm by the fire! It's true, wherever you find love, it feels like Christmas! It's true, wherever you find love, it feels like Christmas! It feels like Christmas! It feels like Christmas…**_

"For some reason, that song made me realize all the joys of Christmas." X Prodigy said.

"I don't blame ya. You're not the FIRST person I've got with that." TL replied, clapping X on the back before saying, "Now, I think we should visit a certain place you should know…Touch the poncho."

X touched TL's poncho and the two faded away again.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The two reappeared in front of a house that was moderately sized.

"Who lives here?" X asked.

"It's Ross'." TL replied, "You've never come to call with your OWN nephew?"

"Not really." X answered, uncomfortably.

"Come on in, X!" TL said, "There's festivities to be seen here!"

The two walked THROUGH the door and saw Ross. Next to him was his wife, Marissa (A/N: Ross owns the character. NOT me.). Surrounding them were other couples—Danny Fenton (Danny Phantom) and Juniper Lee (Life and Times of Juniper Lee), Jaden Yuki and Alexis Rhodes (Yu-Gi-Oh GX), Sora and Kairi (Kingdom Hearts), and Ratchet, Clank (Ratchet & Clank), and Sasha (Ratchet & Clank: UYA).

"Why so down, Ross?" Marissa asked.

"Oh, I just tried to invite my Uncle X Prodigy here yesterday." Ross replied, "Said Christmas was crap. He meant it, too."

"Heh. Sounds like a nice guy." Jaden grinned.

"Jaden, sometimes, you act like an idiot." Alexis stated.

"Hey, no insults at Christmas." Sora said.

"Yeah, let's loosen up a bit." Ratchet suggested.

"How about a game?" Marissa asked.

"Okay." Ross said, standing up, "How about 'Twenty Questions'?" All guests seemed to agree with this suggestions, "Okay, I think of something and you all have to guess what it is within twenty questions."

"I think we should go now…" TL suggested.

"No, I wanna see this." X said.

"Is it a plant?" Sasha asked.

"No." Ross answered.

"Is it mineral?" Clank asked.

"No."

"Is it some kinda animal?" Danny asked.

"Yes."

"Is it found on a farm?" June asked.

"No, NEVER." Ross answered.

"Does it live in the city?" Alexis asked.

"Usually."

"Is it an unwanted animal?" Ratchet asked.

"Most of the time."

"Is it a cockroach?" Jaden asked.

"Nope."

"What about a Lombax?" Clank asked.

"HEY!" Ratchet said, looking offended.

"No, Clank. And Lombaxes aren't exactly unwanted creatures."

"A rat?" Kairi asked.

"No."

"A leech?" Sora asked.

"No, but you're getting warmer."

"Wait!" Marissa said, looking close to connecting the dots, "Lives in the city, is unwanted, and is something like a leech. IT'S X PRODIGY!"

"CORRECT!" Ross said as everyone began to applaud, "Alright, since Marissa got it right, it's her turn now!"

X Prodigy looked VERY insulted.

"WHY did you keep me here?" X asked, irritably.

"I warned you." TL replied, "Now, touch my poncho. We've got places to go!"

X touched the hedgehog's poncho and they vanished again.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The two reappeared in front of a poorer section of town.

"Welcome to the third rung of society." TL replied, "And yet, here, can be as good of a Christmas as ANY."

"Who lives here?" X asked.

"And so, they arrived at a house that, though its occupants were poor, still managed to have a Merry Christmas." D-Dude continued narrating as he and Soldier appeared on the roof next to the chimney. Soldier leaned over.

"OH BOY! GOOSE!" Soldier said, sniffing at it. D-Dude shoved a chimney sweeper down it and began to sweep the chimney, "HEY! You're blocking the smell!"

Soldier then leaned in too far and fell in.

"Is that physically possible?" D-Dude simply asked.

Soldier came to a halt, "Well, at least I'm alive…" he then noticed that he was standing on burning coals, "AND STANDING IN THE FIRE! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW!"

A woman with white hair, blue eyes, and black clothing then looked up, "Airnaruto, don't stop turning that goose! You don't want any part of it to be burned, do you?"

"I can't help it, Hikari." Replied the person turning the goose, Airnaruto, "It just smells so good."

D-Dude slid in through a window as Soldier got out, wincing every time he took a step.

"I don't envy you at this point." D-Dude said.

Outside, X Prodigy looked around to see DM walking alongside a kid, no older than fifteen, wearing a black long-sleeve, a pair of jeans, a Chunin Jacket, and a headband with a river symbol on it. He had big, blue eyes with green marks under them, spiky, red hair with indigo tips, and a crutch. They appeared to be singing some version of 'One More Sleep'.

"Hey, that's DM!" X said.

"And the kid next to him is Airnaruto's apprentice, Little Lunatic." TL said, "Finally, someone shorter than me."

The two opened the door and walked in.

"We're home!" DM called. Hikari walked over and kissed DM on the cheek as another girl named PhoenixofDarkness hugged him.

"Welcome back, DM!" she said.

"Hi, Loony!" said a girl named Kitten Hachi-chan as she hugged Loony.

"Uh…hey, Kitty." Lunatic said.

"Guys, the goose is ready!" Airnaruto called as the pulled the goose out.

"And boy, does it look good!" Lunatic grinned, but then coughed.

"What's wrong with him?" X Prodigy asked.

"The flu." TL replied, "A pretty dang strong one. And the fact that he broke a leg doesn't help much."

"Time for a toast." DM said, raising a glass, "To X Prodigy."

"I've gotta see this!" X said, walking in and phasing through the door.

"To X Prodigy, the founder of our feast." DM said.

"Founder of the feast, indeed!" Hikari said, "If he was here, I'd give him a piece of my mind and hoped that he would CHOKE on it."

"Ouch." TAS and D-Dude said, in unison.

"C'mon, Hime-chan! It's Christmas Day." DM said.

Hikari sighed, "In the spirit of the holiday. Fine. To X Prodigy. May he live long and happily and have a Merry Christmas."

"To X Prodigy." Airnaruto said, barely hiding the contempt in his voice.

"To X Prodigy." Phoenix also said, making no effort to hide hers.

"To Jerk-Face…I mean X Prodigy." Kitty said.

"To X Prodigy." Lunatic said, letting out another quiet cough before saying, "And God bless us, everyone."

"Spirit?" X asked as he felt TL's presence, "Tell me, will that little ninja die?"

"THAT'S the future." TL replied, in a low, Western voice. X saw that the hedgehog now looked far older than he had when he first arrived, "MY area is the present. But, if these shadows remain unchanged, I see an empty chair by the fire, a crutch without an owner, and none of my fellows will find him here."

"Does that mean, Lunatic will…" X was cut-off.

"But if he's going to, he'd better do it and decrease the surplus population." TL interrupted, carelessly.

"You use my own words against me?" X asked, offended.

"Touch my poncho." TL said, "My time's growin' short."

X Prodigy did so.

"And X Prodigy touched the Spirit's poncho as the scene of love and compassion faded into the darkness." D-Dude continued.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

The four reappeared outside a graveyard.

"Spirit, are ya growin' older?" X asked.

"Yeah, my family is notorious for havin' short lives." TL replied, sitting down, "I think mine'll end just before three."

D-Dude and Soldier flew over to the church tower and pulled the bell once. TL began to vanish as mist.

"But, TL, you've taught me so much!" X pleaded, "Please stay!"

"Sorry, but my time's up." TL replied, waving.

"But…you've gotta tell me about Lunatic!" X begged.

"Time for my successor to take it from here." TL said, "Go on and know him better, man!"

TL then vanished as mist that shrouded X Prodigy.

"DON'T GO!" he shouted. He coughed as he staggered through the graveyard.

"Oh boy. THIS is getting creepy. I don't think I can take this!" Angelic Soldier said.

"I agree with you." Dimensiondude replied before looking at the readers, "You're on your own, folks. We'll see you at the finale!"

The two then flew off.


	6. Christmas Future

(A/N: This one is based off the version from Mickey's Christmas Carol. So don't chew my head off if it's short.)

Chapter 6: The Ghost of Christmas Future

X Prodigy coughed as he used a gravestone to support himself. The mist seemed to finally clear up a bit. He looked around. Time seemed to have passed, but it was still the same graveyard.

"Where did TL…" he felt something shock him, "OW!" he looked around for its source and found it, "Oh…who…who're you?"

The person who shocked X was wearing a black jacket, had dark hair and eyes, thick eyebrows, a hooked nose, and was causing electricity to spark between his fingers.

"Are you…the Ghost of…Christmas Future?" X asked, nervously.

"Yes, I am." He replied, "But you can call me Sylar."

"Strange. I expected ya to be wearing a black cape and never talk." X said, uncertainly.

"Yeah, everyone says that." Sylar replied.

"Sylar, just tell me, okay?" X asked, nervously, "What will happen to Little Lunatic?"

"You'll find out…if you look over there." Sylar answered, pointing to a small group of people gathered around a headstone. They were DM, Hikari, Airnaruto, Phoenix, and Kitty. Kitty seemed distraught and Airnaruto seemed to be barely holding back tears. Hikari led them away. DM sniffed a bit before leaving a crutch by the headstone. THIS was all too clear to X Prodigy.

"Oh no…" he said, shocked, "Sylar, I didn't mean for things to be like this!"

"Nobody means for anything to be like this." Sylar stated, "But everything still happens. That's the world we live in."

"But…are these the things that WILL happen or the things that only MIGHT happen?" X asked. He then heard cackling and wheeled over to a bunch of people, who were Darknesses and digging a grave.

The first one had a Hispanic look to him, messy black hair, yellow eyes, several piercings, a tattoo shaped like a scar, and several chains. He was Shackle.

"I've never seen a funeral like THIS one!" Shackle grinned.

The one digging stopped. He had brown hair, red eyes, lots of stubble, a long scar on his face, an axe, and a set of tiger-claws. He was Vordan.

"Yeah." He said, noncommittally, "No mourners or friends to wish him farewell to the other side."

The third one held out a pocket watch. He had wild, black hair, yellow eyes, a jagged sword strapped to his back, a pallid complexion, and an insane smile that gave him the look of a demented raven. He was the leader, Wraith.

"Ah, well." He said, "Let's take a break before we fill it in."

The fourth one had a large smile with teeth filed into triangular points, aqua-blue eyes, and blonde hair shaped like a shark's fin. He was Carcharodon.

"Yes, because it's not like he's GOING ANYWHERE!" Carcharodon shouted, insanely.

The four Darknesses cackled as they walked off. X Prodigy and Sylar walked closer to the grave. X leaned in to get a closer look at who was buried in it. It was too dark to make out the name on the tombstone and the person in the grave was in a coffin.

"Sylar?" he asked, nervously, "Whose lonely grave is this?"

Sylar caused electricity to crackle around his hand, illuminating the name—X Prodigy.

"It's a very special grave." Sylar said, "It's yours…the RICHEST MAN IN THE CEMETARY!"

Sylar flicked his fingers and X Prodigy was shoved in via telekinesis. He barely grabbed a root and was trying to climb out.

"HEY!" X shouted as he tried to climb out.

Sylar simply leaned on the tombstone and smirked at X Prodigy's predicament. X Prodigy continued to try to climb out. He looked down at a red light in the grave. The coffin was opening and there was a fire in it!

"No, NO!" X shouted in terror, "Sylar! Help me!"

Sylar began to snicker at the situation. X Prodigy continued to struggle to get out. He could NOT get in that coffin! He didn't know why, but he could NOT get stuck in there! Sylar's snickers turned into a sadistic cackle.

"Help! PLEASE!" he begged. Sylar simply continued laughing, "I'LL CHANGE!" The root then snapped as X began to fall towards the coffin, "I'LL CHANGE!"


	7. Redemption

Chapter 7: Redemption

X Prodigy sprung up, awake. He looked around as he gasped to try and get his heart-rate back to normal.

"I'm back in my own room…" he said, relieved.

"Yes, the house was his own. The room was his own." D-Dude said. He and Soldier waved as we see outside the window, "Hey, we're back!"

"We told ya we would!"

X Prodigy flung the windows open and the two were sent, plummeting, again.

"THIS LOOKS FAMILIAR!" Soldier shouted.

"I KNOW!" D-Dude replied.

The two landed right in front of Xem as he walked along the street.

"Hey, Roswellian!" X called.

"Oh, YOU." Xem said, making a snowball and throwing it into X's face.

"Okay, I deserved that." X muttered before asking, "What day is it?"

"Friday." Xem replied.

"No, not what day of the week." X shouted, "What DAY is it?!"

"What day is it?" Xem scoffed, "It's CHRISTMAS Day of course!"

"I didn't miss it…" X said, sounding overjoyed, "The Spirits did it all in one night. Of course they could. They can do whatever they like!"

"Uh…of course they can!" Xem replied, looking nervous and obviously doubting X's sanity.

"Hey, has the prized turkey been sold yet?" X asked.

"The one half as big as me?" Xem asked, "No, it hasn't been sold."

"Intelligent young man…" X grinned before shouting, "GO ON AND BUY IT AND I'LL GIVE YA FIVE BUCKS! COME BACK WITHIN FIVE MINUTES AND I'LL GIVE YA TWENTY!"

"Yes, SIR!" Xem replied, saluting, and taking off like a streak of orange, red, and white.

X Prodigy was soon pacing around, as if filled with some indescribable energy.

"I feel different." He said, "I'm as light as a feather, as happy as a schoolboy, and as carefree as a drunkard!" he then knelt down and begged, "Please, help me make up for the time I've lost, Nostalgia Critic. I beg you on my knees. ON MY FRIGGIN' KNEES!"

There was suddenly a knocking on the door and X Prodigy tore downstairs after getting dressed.

Outside, Xem was standing by the door with Moe Syzlack (The Simpsons), who was holding the feet of a large turkey.

"Hey, if this is some sorta joke, tiger-boy, I'll pump ya full o' lead." Moe stated, darkly, as he fingered a shotgun in his other hand.

"It's not a joke, Moe." Xem replied, "If ya don't believe me, wait 'til he comes!"

X Prodigy, now wearing his red jacket, opened the door.

"Oh, you must be the guy with the prized turkey. No, this isn't a joke." X Prodigy explained, "Here's your money and Roswellian, here's yours for being here within five minutes."

"Thanks!" Xem said before darting off.

"Who should I send this turkey to?" Moe asked as he shoved it into a duffel bag.

"DarkMagicianmon's house, but don't tell him who it's from." X replied.

"Your ten bucks." Moe shrugged as he walked off.

"Now that his first deed was done, X Prodigy was ready to celebrate Christmas AND make up for it while he was at it." D-Dude said.

X laughed as he began walking through the snowy streets with a new spring in his step. The first people he came across were the Men in Red.

"Well, well. If it isn't Mr. Let-'em-die-and-decrease-the-surplus-population." Hellboy said with a scowl.

"Shouldn't you be in your house, counting the money you just keep for the heck of it?" Ed asked.

"My gosh, guys. Weren't you reading the fic at all?" Deadpool asked, "Reminds me of another fanfiction I read, which was the GREATEST FIC EVER! And believe me, I don't say that very often!"

"You, we're ignoring." Ed stated.

"Look, guys, I know I'm probably the last person you'd want to talk to, but…I'd like to make a donation." X replied before whispering something. All three of the Men in Reds' eyes widened at this.

"THAT much?" Hellboy asked. X nodded.

"I know you're making a lot of Christmases merry with that." Ed grinned.

"And a lot of rich bank owners even RICHER!" Deadpool added. Hellboy socked the merc for that.

X Prodigy continued on his way and saw the three musicians on the street. They resembled Hanabi, TL, and Sylar. X tossed a coin in the cup, looked over and simply said to them…

"Thank you."

He then walked off.

"Any idea what he's talking about?" Hanabi asked TL with a smile.

"Not at all." TL grinned.

"How about we just keep playing?" Sylar asked.

The three continued playing before vanishing (A/N: So, just think about it…).

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

Moe knocked on a door, which was quickly answered by DM and the rest.

"Uh…what're you doing here?" DM asked.

"Deliverin' the prize turkey." Replied Moe, shoving it into DM's hands.

"Are you sure you've got the right house?" Airnaruto asked.

"You DarkMagicianmon?" Moe asked.

"No, I'm not." Airnaruto replied.

"But I am." Replied DM.

"Then, I've got the right house." Moe said, shoving the duffel bag into his coat, "I was told to send ya this turkey."

"Who's it from?" DM asked.

"He said he should remain anonymous." Moe replied, walking off, "Now, I've gotta get back to the bar before Barney takes all the booze again…"

"Who'd send us this turkey?" Airnaruto asked.

"Maybe the Democrats have gone a step further—forcing people to give up FOOD instead of money." Lunatic said, walking out with his crutch. THAT earned him glares, "No offense."

(A/N: As a citizen of the USA, I find it as my duty to mock our government whenever I possibly can.)

"What're we gonna do with it?" DM asked.

"We'll cook it, eat it, and have the best Christmas dinner we've ever had." Hikari replied.

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

Ross was running across the streets until he saw X in the way.

"Hello, nephew!" X greeted, cheerily.

"Uncle X Prodigy." Ross said, looking concerned, "Are you off your meds or something?"

"I'm not ON any medication and you know it." X deadpanned before asking, "So, is your invitation to Christmas Dinner still open?"

"Well…I'll be danged." Ross said before asking, looking joyous, "You mean you're COMING?"

"Of course I am." X replied, walking off, "I'll be around at two. Keep it nice and hot!"

"I will, Uncle X. I WILL!" Ross said, "Merry Christmas!"

AFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCCAFCC

X Prodigy walked across the snowy streets, still with that amazing bounce in his step. He waltzed over to the door of DM's house and knocked on it. He snickered a bit before taking a serious demeanor.

"Just sec." DM said to his family before answering the door. He saw X Prodigy and immediately paled, "Oh…uh…X Prodigy."

"DM, I didn't see you in work today." X stated.

"You…gave us half a day-off." DM said, nervously.

"Does that SOUND like something I'd do?" the Hollow Devil asked.

"No…I mean yes…I mean…" DM stammered.

"I'll tell you what I'll do…" X Prodigy growled before saying, "Raise your salary, pay your mortgage on the house, and make you my partner."

DM looked like he'd been hit in the face with something large and heavy before asking, "P-partner? Thanks, X Prodigy."

"Heh. No problem." X replied, "Can I come in for a bit?"

"Yeah, you can." DM replied, letting his boss in.

"So…how's this story supposed to end?" Soldier asked D-Dude.

"Like THIS." D-Dude replied before narrating, "And X Prodigy was as good as his word. The people of the town said that he knew how to keep Christmas all year 'round as good as any other man…if a single man did at all."

"What about Little Lunatic?" Soldier asked.

"And to Little Lunatic, who did NOT die…" D-Dude continued. Soldier sighed in relief as the Dragonsaur continued, "X Prodigy was like a second father to him and ALMOST as good a teacher to him as Airnaruto. And, as he said, 'God bless us, everyone'."

"WHERE'S MY MONEY?!" Nostalgia Critic shouted as he bolted in front of the two.

"RUN!" D-Dude and Soldier shouted, in unison. They took off into the sunset as the angry critic followed them, shouting various threats to them.

The End.

Cast:

X Prodigy: Jason Statham

DarkMagicianmon: Christian Bale

Dimensiondude: Doug Jones

Angelic Soldier: John Travolta

The Shygym Brothers: Ryan Reynolds (Glyre), Johnny Yong Bosh (Ken), Josh Keaton (Ryan)

The Men in Red: (Hellboy) Ron Perlman, (Ed Elric) Vic Mignonga, (Deadpool) John Kassir

Roscoso: Johnny Yong Bosh

Xemnas1992: Brendan Fraser

Nostalgia Critic: Doug Walker

Hanabi: Colleen O'Shaughnessey

MistressofDawn: Hayden Panettiere

Urahara: Michael Lindsay

Nukid: Vic Mignonga

Katie: Rachael Leigh Cook

TLSoulDude: Joaquin Phoenix and Sam Elliot

Hikari Ino: Stephanie Sheh

Airnaruto: Jack Black

Kitten Hachi-chan: Kaori Nazuka

PhoenixofDarkness: Dakota Fanning

Little Lunatic: James Arnold Taylor

Marissa: Caitriona Murphy

Sylar: Zachary Quinto

Shackle: Cheech Marin

Vordan: Steve Blum

Wraith: Willem Dafoe

Carcharodon: Bryan Drummond

The End.


End file.
